Say your partner cheated on you, years ago. It was only one time, and they felt really bad about it, and it has no implications for how they’ll behave toward you going forward; but if you knew, it would really hurt you.
Is it better to know or not?
One school of thought says, obviously, yes. (I think this is probably most people’s first intuition?)
Another school of thought says, wait, no. If you don’t know, you can continue to live your life happy; if you do know, you’ll experience a lot of pain. From a basic hedonic utilitarian standpoint, knowing seems bad.
I think I’m in favor of knowing; or at least, being the sort of person who wants to know. It’s not that I don’t buy the utilitarian argument: I’m all for experience machines. But real life isn’t a perfect experience machine, and I think if you’re committed to flinching away from truths that might hurt you, you’ll end up living in fear that they’ll pop up anyway. Seeking out the worst and most painful truths, and finding that you’re able to deal with them, lets you be free.