I think an important fact, that I get wrong way too often, is that other people are never thinking about you nearly as much as you think they are.
other person: I wish someone had done X
me: what does that mean? Well, the only people who could have done it are me and A, and A definitely couldn’t have done it because of B, so they must mean me. But they know I didn’t do X because of Y, so that must mean they think I shouldn’t do Y … so they must think I should do Z instead of Y? But that implies such a low value on my time compared to C’s … oh god, am I really miscalibrated on that?
what they were actually thinking: it sucked for me personally that no one did X, and I’m sad about that